John never thought this was going to happen to him. He was 76, widowed, living alone, and seemed to be in relatively good health. He recently had a physical and was given a clean bill of health. So, when the heart attack came on, he was not just surprised and frightened, but worried about what the future may hold.
When he was in the hospital, his children, grandchildren, and a number of other family members and friends all rallied around him. It felt great to be reminded that so many people care about him. Many of those men and women offered assistance when he was discharged from the hospital, and he felt there was no need to turn to any other option.
After a week being home, his adult daughter was basically the only one left stopping by to check in on him, go shopping for him, and support him. Everyone else had gone back to their normal routine in life.
He understood people had their own responsibilities.
Unfortunately, he also understood the amount of stress that his daughter was under. She didn’t consider herself a caregiver. She kept telling him, “Dad, I’m just glad I can be there for you.” She thought this was her responsibility, something she needed to do because she lived right down the street from him.
He knew she had other responsibilities.
He just didn’t understand why his other children, who didn’t live that far away, maybe just 20 minutes at the most, in the worst traffic, couldn’t seem to be bothered to help her out.
He convinced his daughter to help him find a home care aide to also assist him at times. She was reluctant at first, but he could tell how caregiver stress was affecting her, and knew she would come around and agree.
He started asking questions because he wants to know what had changed from the hospital to his discharge. What he gathered was most of the rest of his family assumed he was fine, that because his daughter was looking after him, he didn’t need anything else.
Sometimes, just because an individual may seem to have adequate care and support, that doesn’t mean it’s enough. It can be placing a tremendous amount of stress and pressure on that individual offering care and support.
Home care aides are great option, and when family suddenly seems to disappear from the picture, for whatever reason, it’s great to know that these professional, experienced caregivers are able to help.
Angel Alliance Caregivers of Galloway, NJ is dedicated to helping seniors maintain full, independent lives where they most desire to live: in the comfort of their own homes. Call us at (609) 965-0028.
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